this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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