wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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