We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize