I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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