yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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