there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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