Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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