Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!