like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
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So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
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I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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