Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
