Just cropdusted the office
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize