She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
