I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
