I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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