I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I need to stop coming to work sober
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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