super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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