i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
what day is it and did you see me today?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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