So drunk, too bad you don't want this
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
