just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
