Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
