i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
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