my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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