Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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