their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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