The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
