btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
