the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
