He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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