I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize
