wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
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