If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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