porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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