I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.