Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.