I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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