If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
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