Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
