TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize