just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
My liver is preforming stress tests.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize