no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
You can't motorboat a personality
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Randomize
