Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
