Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
