Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
