so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Randomize
