at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize