well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Randomize