her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
