I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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