She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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