Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
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