This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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